Nothing Is Wasted

Hi again!

We started school on Wednesday! However, when I say “started”, I mean we had a welcome ceremony and the kids played games and did different activities all day, which was real only a half day. I wasn't sure how I felt about this setup at first, but looking back, I'm glad we did it that way. It gave me a chance to meet my kids outside of the classroom and see what they are like around each other. I also got to see who my “troublemakers” would be. I'm not too worried about them causing any real trouble, though. The worst thing any kid does is talk too much and goof off. I'll take that any day over being rude to other classmates and picking fights with them.

I'm really excited to finally have my own class, mainly because during student teaching, you don't usually get to start the year with the kids. When they're yours, you get to have them from beginning to end. =)

I've always been hard on myself about classroom discipline, mostly because I've never felt like I am very good at it. Yesterday was the first day of classes, and it was a lot of ups and downs. I felt good about my 9^th grade class in the morning, and also with my spunky little 7^th graders, but as the day went on, I started feeling like I should just pack up and go home. In order to understand what my day looks like, you should know how the high school classes work. Instead of the teachers each having their own room and the kids going from class to class, the students each have their own classroom in which the teachers travel to to teach. You see, our school isn't very big, I believe around 80 kids total in the high school side. My 7^th grade class is 25 and my 8^th and 9^th graders are around 15 each, give or take a couple (we don't have finalized class lists yet).

The thing I really like about this, however, is that I can have each grade two and sometimes three times a day, just not all together. I thought this was terrible at first, but now I see its' benefits. My 7^th graders are really great...in the morning. After lunch all you can do is pray they take a little away from the lesson. So, I now know that when planning, I want to do the more important teaching in the morning, so they have a better chance of soaking in the material. The bad thing, though, is that I may never actually get used to this schedule since it changes every parcial (their term for quarter).

All in all, I know my biggest struggle will be dealing with behavior issues, but I also have learned from the past to give myself some grace, especially since I am known to take it personally when I mess up once and think it's the end of the world. That's what I love about teaching, it, like many other jobs, allows you to start fresh the next day and improve from the day before. I just need to stay positive, no matter how bad the situation is. For example, yesterday I was supposed to be teaching an 8^th grade class at 12:30 because of a new schedule change they made. The only problem was they didn't tell ME about the change. I went in unprepared because I forgot my materials at the teacher house in a rush to get to class. The class could tell I wasn't ready, and while they helped come up with a good game for us to play, I feel like it took away some of my authority figure. Today more than made up for it, though, because we played a great game of getting to know each other. In short, there was a lot of running to each others' desks so we didn't have to be stuck in the middle telling all about ourselves. I think the kids got a lot out of it with seeing how I am, and that's what was most important.

I am really looking forward to getting to share Jesus with them in class. Not only that, but I hope to share my story with them, too. God has never let me forget how beautiful of a story He is writing in my life. I mean, this time a couple years ago I was suffering from a life-threatening blood disorder. And now I'm in Honduras for a whole year!!?? The ONLY way that could ever happen is by God Himself. I've been really encouraged this past week with the words from the book of James. My best friend Debra shared these words with me during my student teaching and I am so thankful to still have them to look back on now. In the Message version, the beginning of James 1 goes like this: “Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.” Pretty great, right? Before school started, I just felt very lost and like I had no business being here. I didn't see my purpose yet because I wasn't teaching yet. I really wanted to go home. That, my friends, would have been a shame. If I had, I never would have gotten to see why God placed me here. Actually, I still don't fully know why, but it's becoming a little clearer each day.

I am beyond grateful for my past, because it has led me to my future, to my “right now”. I would never have wanted to miss this! All the bumps and bruises along the way (literally) were worth it for me to be here now. It's going to be a hard year. But it's also going to be full of God. I'm so glad I get to share it with you, too! Maybe you needed to hear those words from James today, too. If there's something really difficult you're dealing with, keep pushing through it. From plenty of past experience, I know God will not let it go to waste.